


Is Half a Lie Really Better than the Whole Truth?

by prin_zyth



Category: Seraphina - Rachel Hartman
Genre: F/M, Fluff, I'm gay and they're straight but their relationship is fuckin adorable, Pregnancy, otp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-24 02:58:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14946321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prin_zyth/pseuds/prin_zyth
Summary: It was nearly dawn, and they were lying in bed, and she knew she had to tell him.





	Is Half a Lie Really Better than the Whole Truth?

It was nearly dawn, and they were lying in bed, and she knew she had to tell him.

“Claude?” she half-asked, not entirely sure if he was awake; she was still staring at the ceiling, but she could feel him turn toward her in the darkness.

“Yes?” he answered, his voice, like hers, uncertain and questioning. Linn turned onto her side to face him and found that his outline was almost indistinguishable from the room around him. The dark hair framing his face and his matching eyes almost seemed akin to the night itself, both dark and frank yet oddly elusive.

She took a deep breath and sat up a little, propping herself onto her elbow. “Is half a lie really better than the whole truth?” It was such a weighted question, much more so than she intended to let on to him. She shut her eyes, suddenly nervous for his response and everything it could and would mean for them. It had taken a lot to ask.

Claude started to laugh, a small, quiet chuckle, and she opened her eyes in surprise, scanning his face, trying to understand. Was this normal behavior for humans? Should she laugh, too? What were the social expectations for this situation? These things seemed to be second nature for most humans, but as a saar, they constantly evaded her understanding. She often felt as though there was an invisible wall separating her from the rest of the world, on that she could only learn to climb through years of practice and effort and exposure.

She decided to trust her saar instincts (not they’d served her especially well in the past) and err on the side of stiffness. She scanned his face again, and detected a second layer, beneath the humor, of concern and doubt. Her brows drew together in confusion, and he stopped laughing. After a few seconds, she finally asked, “What?”

He reached under the covers to grab her hand, then raised it to his lips and kissed it, never releasing her eyes from his own. She felt a jolt, like electricity, not that he would understand. She shuddered a bit and lowered her eyes, feeling self-conscious about having maintained eye contact for that long.

“My dear Linn,” he began, squeezing her hand as he said her name, “that was such an odd thing to say. Are you sure you’re alright?” He released her hand to bring his up to her face and touch the bottom of her chin. She met his gaze once again; the concern she’d identified earlier was now center stage in his expression.

“It’s just...ugh!” She rolled back over, flinging herself into her pillow. She sighed and went on. “Let me try again.” How could she explain this? She wanted a metaphor, but metaphors felt clumsy and limited, at best.

“Love is understanding someone, right?” Linn began. “I understand you, and you understand me. Correct?”

Claude propped himself up onto his elbow, suddenly intrigued by the new direction of the conversation. “I agree,” he said, nodding.

She went on. “And understanding, at its core, is truth, right? We love each other because we know the truth of each other. That’s love.”

He laughed again, this time a true laugh, untainted by worry or doubt. She sighed; he clearly wasn’t taking her seriously. “A somewhat barren way to put it, but yes, I suppose. You sound like a saar, to tell you the truth.” She flinched, but he didn’t notice.

She continued, her previous confidence lost. “So if you love someone, you tell them the truth. Your truth. But what if your truth...would make them not love you anymore?” She rolled over and stared pointedly at the wall, keeping her back pointed at him.

There was a long silence between the two before Claude asked, “Linn, did something...happen?”

“Claude, I…” Her voice caught; she was crying now. “I’ve given things up. For us. And I would do it again, no question, no regrets. But…”

She couldn’t say anything else without giving away her past. Despite all her talks of truth, that was something she couldn’t share. But she did have something that she did need to tell him.

She finally rolled back over onto her back and crossed her arms over her abdomen, almost defensively. “Claude…”

“Linn, stop.” She looked over, and she couldn’t see if he was angry or hurt or...she just couldn’t tell. “Linn, I love you. And, as you so eloquently put it,” he grinned, clearly teasing her, “that means I love your truth, too. I don’t know all of your truths, true, but I know your truth, the truth of Linn.” He pointed at her heart, and she felt the jolt again. “And whatever this is, it won’t change how I feel about you.” He leaned in, and was now just inches away from her face. She felt blood rush to her cheeks, although to anyone else, it would’ve looked like she was growing pale.

“Claude, I’m pregnant.”

Silence.

There was complete and utter and silence and it scared her and she suddenly need to fill it desperately. She grew panicked.

“And it’s been several months, and I’ve known for a while, and I’m just starting to show, and I’m so scared, Claude, how do I…”

She was cut short when he grabbed her forearm, look pointedly at her, and half-asked, half-stated, “Linn, you’re pregnant?”

“Yes,” she replied weakly, looking directly at him.

There was another silence, but it was calmer, and inexplicably peaceful.

“Linn,” Claude began, “this is amazing.”

She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding.

“And I understand,” he continued. “I understand about being afraid, but we can do this together, and it’s going to be a wonderful journey.

He didn’t understand, because in the end, he didn’t know her truth, not all of it. But he was right: they were going to conquer this together.

Just then, a bell tower in the distance chimed, signaling that the morning was here. Linn had never liked the day; night could be uncomfortably mysterious, but day was too honest and frank, and she didn’t trust it. And of course, it also meant that Claude had to leave.

She sighed and stared up at the ceiling, not wanting this moment to end. Claude leaned over and gently kissed her cheek, then sat up and finished getting dressed. As he was leaving and the door was almost closed, Linn called out, “Claude, wait!”

He didn’t respond for a second, clearly surprised, and then turned to face her with a questioning look.

“I love you.”

He smiled (sadly? She couldn’t tell), and then he whispered back, “I love you, too.” He remained in the doorway for a few seconds longer, then shut the door and left.

She couldn't tell what time would bring. Would the Embassy find her, or the Censors? Could she give birth to this half-human baby growing inside of her? Would she even survive? Was this secret really something that she could continue to keep? These questions, which had been clouding her every thought, suddenly faded from view. She still couldn’t answer them, but she knew that whatever happened, Claude would stand by her. That was his truth.

And she was content to know that he knew that she loved him, because that was hers.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, and hope you enjoyed! Please check out my other story: "Progressions," a Seraphina/Glisselda (Phelda?) one-shot.
> 
> Also, official announcement! I have decided that the ship name of Linn and Claude is Laude.
> 
> Laude is also my new OTP, btw.


End file.
